What I'm Learning about Patience

Here's the setting:

Son comes down to eat his 87th snack of the day at 10:00pm.  I'm wrapping up, locking up, and turning off lights.  He sits down at the kitchen table.  I do too.  

He eats like a sloth on barbiturates.

Every cracker gets divided into 64ths.  Chewing is like glacial activity.  The peanut butter between the crackers gets licked off...every microgram of it.

Me-to-myself:  JUST EAT YOUR @#$)#%*(@$ CRACKERS SO WE CAN GO TO BED BECAUSE I'M FREAKING TIRED ALREADY AND ISN'T THIS YOUR 12TH PACKAGE OF PEANUT BUTTER CRACKERS TODAY???

Me-to-him:  Hey bud.  Tell me about camp.  What was the coolest thing you learned or had reinforced? (while still steaming on the inside)

Him-to-me:  Some thoughtful responses, some late night blather.  

Me-to-him:  What's one thing you need to do to reinforce all that?

Him-to-me:  I need to _____________.  (a solid action step)  Hey dad, you want one of these crackers?

Me-to-him:  Nope.

He finished just short of 22 hours later (it seemed), washed his hands, brushed his teeth (again).  Then, at the top of the stairs as he was headed to his room and I was headed to mine...

"Hey dad.  Thanks for sitting with me.  It was really great to talk to you.  Goodnight!" *big hug*

Me-to-myself:  Thank you God that I didn't say out loud all the impatient things I was thinking...

Here's what I'm learning about patience:

I'm only patient when things don't go as I planned in either direction or timing.  That's the only time I get to exercise patience.  When it goes my way, no patience is needed.

Be smart enough not to say everything that I'm thinking.  And be gracious enough not to hold other people to what they said but may not have meant in the heat of the moment.  Parents.  Kids.  Spouses.  Bosses.  Employees.  They all apply.

I can't think of an example in my life or those I know where someone says, "Gee, I wish I would've been less patient there."  The payoff for patience can look like a life-giving hug at the top of the stairs or something meaningful to you.  But it almost always pays off.  To be clear, I'm not talking about passivity here - sitting and doing nothing and expecting God to sort it all out.  I'm talking about patience - the kind of intentional and active waiting (or sitting at the table conversing over peanut butter crackers) that the Bible describes.

Here's hoping that helps someone today.

Back to Blogging: Transformation

Well, it's more than a little odd to be sitting here typing since it's been about a billion years (in blog years, of course) since a new post has gone up.  The truth is, after quite a run with hospitals, etc., I just didn't have much to say.  I was committed to saying exactly that.

A long time ago I heard a guy say that if I concerned myself with having something to say, God would provide the opportunities to say it.  I have lived by that credo ever since.

So I'm back because I think I have found my blog-voice, so to speak.  And the word of the day is transformation.

Chipper Gaines loves #DemoDay.  He loves it so much he even prints shirts about them that you can buy at Magnolia Market.

If you're not a Fixer Upper fan, sorry.  Because of our Waco connection and one of their first houses being two doors down from us when we lived there, we're fans.

The thing about #DemoDay that no one glorifies is the pain involved.  There is so much to be destroyed, taken down, beaten out, rolled up, carted off, hauled out, and trashed.  Sinks.  Floors.  Sheetrock.  Wood.  Cabinets.  Appliances.  Some come out pretty easy and some take more than a little bit of elbow grease.  There is blood.  There is sweat in buckets.  And there is loss.  That's what #DemoDay is.  Removal of the old to make room for the new.

You see what I did there, don't you?

The most painful part of transformation is the #DemoDay part.  There are times when, in order to build something into us, God has to take something out of us.  There is blood (His...since we don't have to resist to the point of shedding ours according to Hebrews 12).  There is sweat - most often ours as we worry about and work toward the cleansing.  And there is loss.

If you're in the position where it's mostly Sledge Hammers instead of finish work, I want to encourage you that God has "far, far greater things ahead than anything we leave behind" (C.S. Lewis).

On Lines in the Sand

There's a relatively new book out that talks about the holiness of not judging another (upfront disclaimer:  I have not read the book nor am I commenting on any particular content of it).  I appreciate the thrust of that as Jesus is pretty clear on what that means and looks like.  What I have significant concern about is the lack of discernment that often comes with it when applied in our cultural moment.

One description of the book talks about ways we can erase lines in the sand that keep people from coming to Jesus, or even coming to us and then to Jesus.  Again, I appreciate the thrust of that.  I think any barrier that can be removed should.

But some can't.

And frankly, it's not lines in the sand that keep people from coming to Jesus.  It's the line that is drawn right through the human heart that bends it toward selfishness and rebellion and ends in brokenness and...wait for it...judgment.

Away with the manmade, line-in-the-sand barriers.  I'm all for that.  But some heartmade barriers cannot be put aside.

If anyone wants to be my apprentice, let he or she live self-denyingly, take up a cross everyday, and follow Me. ~ Jesus

If anyone comes to Me and the other relationships of parents, family, and even his or her own life don't look like hate in comparison to following Me, then that person is not really a follower at all. ~ Jesus (again)

The people who deny that Jesus is who He says He is and say He didn't come in the flesh:  they aren't followers of Christ but the antiChrist. ~ John

Like children following the example of their father, don't wrap your life around or give room to desires you used to do, but be holy like God is holy. ~ Peter

There are things to put to death, there are things to put away, and there are things to put on.  Be careful to do all of that as the Word of Christ instructs you. ~ Paul

On and on we could go.  Those just can't be taken away which is where so many end up, even though they never intend to get there, when they start talking about removing barriers to the Gospel.  And that approach is long on tolerance but weighed and found wanting on discernment.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

1-and-1 Free Throws and Spiritual Growth

March Madness is over.  Now comes a rather drab NBA playoff and then baseball.  Insert my sad face here.

And for the first time in history, my mom beat the other brothers and yours truly on our bracket picks.  I haven't even managed to tally the scores yet because of the embarrassment.

There's a situation that a player finds himself in as a basketball game goes on.  In the college game, you get to 7 team fouls in a half and you shoot a 1-and-1.  They call it that because if you don't get the first, you'll never get the second.  Missing one means missing two.  Make the first and you get a shot at the second.

There's a situation like that in the spiritual life as well.  One in which if you don't get the first, you won't get the second.  Missing one means missing both.

In our spiritual lives of following Jesus, if we don't take the time to do the basics, we'll miss the other stuff too.  In my opinion, the basics are prayer and Bible intake.  That's the first 1 of the 1-and-1.

What would be the others that you would miss?  Here's a possible list...

- Meaningful worship that is fueled be worship throughout the week and isn't solely an emotional experience.
- Service that's a joy instead of a labor.
- Sacrifice that doesn't mind being inconvenienced instead of only when I somehow benefit from it.

Should I go on?

Let me go ahead and caveat here:  if you don't read your Bible every day, you can still have meaningful worship, etc.  God is God and can do as He pleases.  Further, you can do the basics and have a bad attitude while you serve, etc.

That being said, the most consistent path to the And-1's of life with Jesus happen because a person chooses to commit regular time to prayer and Bible intake.

How to do that?  There are a number of ways.  I personally enjoy the McCheyne reading plan.  But on principle, just remember that prayer is talking with God about things of mutual concern and Bible intake is more than just reading words but interacting with a Person.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

Objective Measures, Part Deux

Yesterday I argued that there are a couple of objective measures in the spiritual life that help us determine how we're really doing.  One is the keeping track of our treasure (whatever form it might be, but especially and uniquely our spending) to determine the state of our hearts.  In my particular ministry context of suburbia, it's a good one to keep handy and steadily employed.

The second is how we deal with trials.  Peter talks about trials as walking through fire, being refined as you go.  There are multiple other images to go with that, but here's the essence of it:  how we respond when trials come is an objective measure of the state of our spiritual lives, of our hearts.

If we respond with griping, we are probably struggling with entitlement.

If we respond with multiple Facebook posts about how hard our lives are, we are worshiping the idol of attention.

If we respond with withdrawal, we are living with and in anger - at God, at ourselves, at our spouse, at our kids, etc.

If we respond with blame, we are either unwilling to accept our part (whatever it might be, big or small) or we are struggling with the victim mentality.

If we respond with joy, then our hearts are in pretty good shape.  So Paul (Romans 5) and James (James 1) both command us to rejoice in our trials.  And if that's what comes out of our hearts when trials come, we're in good shape.  

No, it may not come at first.  The Lord knows I'm prone to griping and withdrawing.  But an objective measure of the state of your heart is whether joy is present in trial.  It's never because of the trial itself.  It's always because of what the trial is working in us, uniquely the transformation of our hearts.

Treasure and Trials.  Two gifts (though not always wanted) to help us self-diagnose our hearts.  Strange gifts.  But good ones.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

Baylor Football, Objective Measures, and So Forth

On New Year's Day, I was sorely disappointed to watch my Baylor Bears blow a three-score lead in the fourth quarter of the Cotton Bowl.  But if you're "America's #1 Offense" and can't put any points on the board in the 4th quarter, I'm not sure you deserve to win a bowl game.

What it told me is that although Baylor is a very very good football program, one of the most exciting in the nation to watch, we're not quite top-tier...yet.

Bowl games (in that sense) are a good, objective measure of the entirety of the football program.  It puts appropriate stress on coaches, players, logistics, fan base, and so on.  When you're not quite ready for the big-time, it shows.  It's an objective measure.

There are a couple of objective measures in our spiritual life, though admittedly they're not as exciting as a bowl game and there's no national television coverage.

Jesus said it this way:  "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."  If you want to know the status of your heart, look and see where your treasure is.  Treasure, in this sense, is most easily and significantly monetary resources.  But it can be expanded to anything you count as a resource:  time, relational capital, unique abilities, and so forth.  The heart is the inmost part of our selves, the part Jesus lovingly lays siege to, captures, and ultimately conquers so that He can renovate it to His liking.

In an important way, that's a real gift.  It allows us to really see what the status of our spiritual life is, not what we think it is or hope it might be.  Where our treasure is, there our heart will be too.

But that also works the other way:  if we learn to redirect our treasure, our heart can come into line.  Our priorities determine our passions, not vice versa.

So here at the outset of 2015 with all our resolutions and diets and regimes anew, I hope we all take a moment and take stock, objectively, of the state of our hearts.  I hope we clear some path for our priorities to be realigned as necessary so that when 2016 rolls around the state of our heart is better off than it was today.

Priorities determine passions.  That's objectively true.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

The Bears vs. the Longhorns: Ugliness and an Implication

I'm a Baylor Bear.  Those words haven't always been as fun to say as they are these days, but it's true.  I am a Green and Gold kind of guy.  The Queen and I met there.  I still love the school.  We did ministry there.  We have friends there.  On and on.

We squared up against the Longhorns this past Saturday in Austin.  That usually ends up very poorly for us as a football team.

But not this Saturday.  Granted, it was as ugly as two aardvarks and a mud puddle, but we did walk away with the W.

At one point, I tweeted that we looked more like butter knives than steak knives.  We needed to be a lot sharper.  Outside of a blocked kick returned for a touchdown, we were anemic at best.  But we stuck it out.  Our team kept doing what they needed to do - defense, tackling, blocking, and so forth.  We won.  28-7, in case you're keeping score at home.

We won because we kept doing what needed doing.

Keep doing what needs doing.

Spiritually dry?  Keep doing what needs doing - prayer, Bible, service.

Marriage running on empty?  Keep doing what needs doing - talking, time.

Relationship frayed?  Keep doing what needs doing - forgiveness, mercy, blessing.

I could keep going but you get the idea.  Personally and pastorally, I know there are seasons of my own life and those I love in which things are easier, more fruitful, etc.  But in the hard seasons, just doing what needs to be done is how you keep walking, keep going, and stay faithful.

The emotions have to come along with it eventually.  The energy does too.  But just keep walking

Keep doing what needs doing.

The difficult simplicity of remembering

This past week was the normal kind of insanity around our household (thus, the lack of blogging).  I really do think my wife and I need to keep better story logs.  There might be a "no way could this happen to one family" book in them.

Tuesday night, I watered the dog as usual.  Moving the bowl from the sink to the tray outside is all of about 25 feet and somewhere along the way I spilled about an ounce.  On the tile.  In the middle of the walkway...or in our house, the runway.

You know where this is going, right?

Peanut runs.  Peanut slips.  Peanut falls.  Peanut cries.

After several minutes of crying and a pretty significant goose egg, Peanut asks the Queen, "What day is today?"

Huh?

And it got worse from there.  I had promised her a dollar because she had helped me clean up something.  She didn't remember it.

"What did you have for dinner?"  "Uhm...was it breakfast for dinner?" (no, sloppy joes)

"How did you get home today?"  "Uhm...riding my scooter?"  (no, mom picked you up)

Hello E.R. visit.  Hello doctor bills.  Hello concussion.

We kept cheering for her to remember.  She didn't.  Her memory did return about an hour or so later.  But we were E.R.-bound long before then.  Scary stuff.

She was concentrating, but she couldn't call things to mind.

One of the most potent condemnations of God's people in the Old Testament was that they didn't remember.  They didn't remember what God had done at the Red Sea.  They didn't remember the manna from heaven.  They didn't remember the laws on the tablets.  They didn't remember His promises to them about a land.  And on and on I could go.

Before I go casting stones (or before you grab yours), let's *ahem* remember that we are good forgetters too.  Forgetting that it wasn't the blood of bulls and rams that saved us, but treating it lightly by loving sin so easily.  Forgetting that His mercy is a daily renewable quantity but our ingratitude even toward something simple like air is our living testimony that we don't believe in mercy.  And I could go on and on.

Maybe take a second.  Maybe see if His goodness and faithfulness and mercy toward you haven't been present.

Maybe see His love.  I think that's one of the reasons the cross is so graphic.  If I forget His love, all I have to do is look at that horror captured in a historic moment.

Maybe I can remember better.  Maybe you can too.  Maybe that will prompt us both to meaningful praise.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

Why I'm Anti-Antinomian

Confusing enough title?  I don't typically like to be anti-anything, but this has to be.

Antinomianism is the term theologians give to the teaching that we are no longer under the Law of God therefore have no need to obey it.  We have license to do as we will, the point being to get to the place where we "will" the good things God wants us to do.

The problem with that line of thinking is this:  God reveals what He wants us to do in His Word, through His commands, precepts, instructions, and...yes...laws.

Quickly, when you talk about The Law, you have to understand which parts we're talking about.  In the Old Testament, there are three divisions of The Law:

Civil Law:  this doesn't apply to us because we're not part of the political entity of the second millennia B.C. that was called the nation of Israel.

Cultic Law:  this is the law given to the people of Israel to govern their worship.  We are no longer under obligation to this because Jesus has fulfilled this for us.  Basically, look at the book of Hebrews.  We don't worship in the temple, Jesus is our Temple.  We don't need to make sacrifices, Jesus is our sacrifice.  We don't need a high priest, Jesus is our High Priest (and on and on).

Moral Law:  it gets a little tricky here because the moral laws were wrapped in and around the civil and cultic laws and had consequences in both realms.  But my argument is that the moral law is still in force for us in this way:  NOT so that we can be right before God (only the blood of Jesus does this), but because it is the path on which we are to walk.  Furthermore, the Spirit of Jesus is in us...that Jesus, the Law-Keeper and Law-Fulfiller.  And so, it would make sense that the Spirit of Jesus would help us do what He did.  And the New Testament uses the same summations as the Old:  the law can be summarized as loving God and neighbor.

Two quick verses that help make the case and give us some wisdom when thinking about this.

Those who forsake the law praise the wicked, but those who keep the law strive against them (Prov 28.4)

If one turns away his ear from hearing the law, even his prayer is an abomination (Prov 28.9)

Want to be a wicked praiser?  Want to have your prayers rise like abominations to God?  I don't either.

I don't depend on the Law to make me right with God.  I'm hopeless if that's the case.  I depend on Christ and Him alone.  But I believe He empowers me, by His Spirit, to live according to God's standard.  And that's why I'm anti-antinomian.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

The eye is the lamp of the body

The eye is the lamp of the body.  So says Jesus.

What that practically means is that your gaze has gravity.

The Ninja likes to ride his bike one-handed.  And then he looks at something he passes.  His hand follows his look, and he ends up on the ground.

When I was learning to drive, my dad always talked about looking where I was going and I'd help the car get there.

At Family Camp every year, Swanee (the wrangler-in-chief) tells us to look to where we want to go and the horse will go there, because our body will direct him that way.

When I was learning to ski, I remember the ski instructor talking about looking where I wanted to go and my body would follow.

The eye is the lamp of the body.

If I look at temptation, I will go there.  If I look at Christ, I will go to Him.  If I look at my trial, I will go where it leads.  If I look at Jesus, I go where He leads.  If I look at things I ought not, I will go there.  If I look at the Bible, I go there.  If I look at money, I'll seek it.  If I look at the Kingdom, I'll seek it.

Your gaze has gravity.  Put it in the right place.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

Anesthesia for your Soul

Do you have THAT thing?

You know what I'm talking about.  THAT thing that will make you happy, or so you think.  THAT thing that, if you had it, would ensure your significance and value.  THAT thing that, if yours, would make sure you felt secure and safe.

In preaching through Galatians, it seems like THAT thing for the Galatian churches was their religion.  It's a good salve, really.  You feel like you're handling the holy while staying in control.  It's the best of both worlds:  something beyond myself that is still about myself.

Some people don't do religion.  It's pleasure.  It's money.  It's power.  In days gone by, it was statues or mountains or the ocean.

Here's the rub.  We take on the characteristics of whatever we worship.  And make no mistake, whatever the identity of THAT thing is, that's your object of worship.  If it's not Christ, it's idolatry.  But even worse, we become as empty as the idols we give our allegiance and affections to.  What we behold is what we become.

Why do we pursue it?  Because it provides anesthesia for our soul.  We feel the ache.  So we drink.  We have the emptiness haunting us.  So we try a lover.  We feel the pain of our finite lives.  So we earn and earn and earn.

Maybe those aren't your vices.  Maybe you, like me, can't stand rejection and addict yourself to the approval of others, or at the very least their lack of disapproval.

The list could go on.

The lack of pain is no substitute for genuine healing.  It can numb us, true.  But we need more the next time around.  And if we don't get healed up in the right way, the wounds fester and get misshapen and cause problems elsewhere in the system of our soul.

The only thing can heal your soul and mine is Jesus.  It's by His stripes we are healed.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

Pastor Saeed, an Easter Message from Prison, and an Advertisement

I was reading a news website last night about Pastor Saeed Abedini and his plight in an Iranian prison.  In case this is news to you, Saeed was captured, arrested, tried, and sentenced for being a Christian and sharing the Gospel.  He has been beaten, tortured, denied medical care, and other violations of decent humanity (much less international conventions).

The measure of a regime or any society is how it treats its most vulnerable.  Prisoners qualify in some senses, especially political rather than criminal prisoners.

What was interesting, though, was the juxtaposition of the story with the advertisement below.  It says plenty about our societal values, and maybe has a word for us about our level of Christian commitment.  Here's the screen shot:

Do you see the irony there?  

Our culture is wanting us to buy their product or service by appealing to our culturally conditioned need for security.  Pastor Saeed writes about how we want the power of the resurrection without the pain of the cross.  

That, to me, is a blistering indictment of my heart.  Because I want security.  And yes, I want it (at least sometimes) at the cost of my faith.

But someone as crazy as the Apostle Paul said that living is Christ and dying is...I'm having trouble remembering how Philippians 1.21 goes.  I think it might have been living is Christ and dying is less advantageous than living securely.  Or something like that.

And someone as authoritative as Jesus said to fear someone who can kill the body and try not to stress out the One who can kill the body and throw you into an unpleasant place.  Again.  I may be misquoting that slightly.  I'm having trouble remembering the verse (Matthew 10.28).

Anything familiar to your heart in that?

Why Following at a Distance is no bueno

I continue to be struck by the phrase in Luke 22.54 about how, seeing Jesus arrested, Peter followed Him at a distance.

That's always the safest bet, isn't it?  Or it seems that way.  But consider...

1.  Jesus gets no (or little) glory from my following at a distance.  I am the light of the world in relation to Him being the Light of the World.  Like a mirror, I'm only as bright in my reflectino as I am close to the source of the light.  And if I'm not close, I cannot let my light shine before men, no one will see my good works, and no one will glorify the Father in the heavens (Matt. 5.16).

2.  What gets passed on to those around me, and in particular my children who are close enough to me to compare words and actions, is some sense of "good enough."  This much is enough, and no more is needed.  No one passes on a passion and excitement for the Kingdom of God with a "good enough" posture of faith.  Again, I'm thinking primarily of my kids.  It's through the commendation (praise!) of God's works that the passion gets passed down (Ps. 145.4-7).

3.  Stuff either (a) doesn't get done or (b) I don't get to participate in it.  The "greater works" (John 14.12) Jesus wants me to do are not done or someone else does them.  I know the blessing and satisfaction of being in on seeing God move.  If I'm safely at a distance, I do not know that blessing and at best live vicariously.

4.  I have no satisfaction.  If Jesus truly is the Bread of Life and Living Water, I have to be close enough to Him to eat and drink (in a sense) to find that "whoever comes to Me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in Me shall never thirst" (John 6.35).  The satisfaction that Jesus promises does not happen and cannot be laid hold of at a distance.  The interactive intimacy of relationship with Christ is the place of satisfaction.

There may be more, but it's something I'm pondering these days.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

I can almost gloat

With the quite stunning reversal of World Vision's original decision to hire people in homosexual marriages in states that have deemed them legal, I could almost gloat.

Not because I had much to do with it.  I didn't.  You can measure my impact with a ridiculously long list of zeroes to the right of the decimal point.

Frankly, not because I invested all this prayer into it.  I didn't.  I remember muttering something like, "Et tu, Brute?" to the Throne Room when I heard about it.  I remember praying before posting.  I have to call that about it.

Not because I'm a stakeholder in World Vision.  We did sponsor a child through them about 3 years ago.  When our sponsored child left the program, we chose not to renew.  We were donor-fatigued from the extra mailings and phone calls we got from them.  Previously, we had sponsored a child through Compassion International.  Our experience was very different with them, which is why I continually recommend them.

None of those reasons.

I could almost gloat because I was on the "winning" side.

Even typing that into words makes me not particularly like the guy typing it.  It's pride.  That thing God actively, present-tense opposes.  Ugh.

I don't get to gloat when the Kingdom advances because it's not my Kingdom.  I don't get to gloat when Truth wins the day because I'm not its author.  I don't get to gloat when prayers are answered in the way I pray them because they aren't my answers (and there have been a Library-of-Congress-size catalog of prayers that haven't been answered in the way I prayed).

And I don't get to gloat in this moment either (though the temptation is admittedly there).

Here's where I am this morning and I hope it's helpful to someone:  when the right thing is done and you're on that side, don't gloat.  Go on about your business and keep doing right.  There will be a day when you are on the side of right but the wrong thing is done.  Go on about your business and keep doing right.

Because the measure isn't whether you won or lost - it's whether or not you remained faithful.

This Crazy Life of Ours

The Queen had the audacity to ask me the other night, "So...do you think we're signing on to a life of never-ending craziness?"

"Of course we are."

Our adoption this time has taken 25% of the time it took with Peanut.  25% of the time.  That's crazy. The mountains we have seen God move have been Himalayan, and that's crazy - but He never got tired, thankfully.  We are flying out in a few days (we even got reasonable airfare).  That's crazy.  We'll come back to a slew of medical appointments, which will open up a whole new can of craziness.

But through it all, I can absolutely say this:  we never would've seen God move in the ways He has if we had stayed comfortable.

May that be a lesson we continually live - and may you risk something and find it to be true too.


P.S.  Happy Anniversary to Heritage Park.  Thanks for putting up with me for 7 years.

The Beauty and the Beast

We've had a few situations in life and church and ministry and life (can I repeat that?) that remind me of the Beauty and the Beast.  Here's the beastly part:

People sin.  They're really good at it too.  I wish I could exclude myself from this category.  I wish I could somehow exempt my kids or church members or any number of folks I care about from this.  But I can't.  We're all jacked up.  Everyone of us.

But the beauty?  Sheesh.  It's gorgeous.  Sunrise or sunset, take-your-breath-away, stop-and-stare, mouth open, pancake-sized eyes, maybe even a little-bit-of-drool kind of beautiful.  It's the kind of beauty that finds a rose in the middle of a trash heap.  The contrast is actually what enhances what's is inherent within it already.

The beauty is the redemption.

Lives are changed from getting t-boned and bashed by circumstances to a steadiness of foot amid the wreckage.  People go from an immature, selfish, emotional two-year old to people you'd count on to be your pallbearers.  The tree bark that your nose is pressed into and is so uncomfortable and threatening becomes a reminder that there is a forest and not just a tree, so the perspective changes and the big picture is something better than you could have ever painted - heck, ever imagined.

The kicker for me is that I often times find myself desiring the beauty of redemption without the beast of what we need to be redeemed FROM.  If there's not a messy artist's studio, there's no amazing art that comes from it.  It pushes me toward patience until the beauty shows itself.

Be patient, Trent.  Be patient.

Thoughts for a Thursday

Brennan Manning, in his gem of a book The Ragamuffin Gospel, has one of my favorite quotes about the stuttering and halting nature of discipleship of all time.  Some mental chewing gum today...

When I get honest, I admit I am a bundle of paradoxes.  I believe and I doubt, I hope and get discouraged I love and I hate, I feel bad about feeling good, I feel guilty about not feeling guilty.  I ma trusting and suspicious.  I am honest and I still play games.  Aristotle said I am a rational animal; I say I am an angel with an incredible capacity for beer. (p.22 of Multnomah's 1990 edition)

Isolation: It's Demonic

Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment (Prov. 18.1).

I said in yesterday's blog post that isolation is demonic.  Don't get me wrong.  I'm not talking about occasional solitude which, in our crazy world, would do the soul good.  I'm talking about the kind of isolation that happens when we get to thinking that (a) we don't need others or (b) we don't want others.

In my experience, not needing others comes from failing (or being failed) so many times that my pride prevents the pain.

Not wanting others comes when we know we're in the wrong but we don't want to be confronted about it.

Both are Satanic.  Demonic.  Bad.  Evil.  Wrong.

Those who isolate themselves don't think straight - they "break out against all sound judgment" because they don't have the kind of interaction that helps remind us of Reality.  It leaves us to "seek our own desire" and keep running down a path of destruction.

And it spirals.  Destruction breeds pain and probably shame.  Pain/Shame breeds hiding.  Hiding breeds more isolation.  Isolation breeds destruction.  And on the spiral goes, down and down and down until the brutal conclusion of a life in shambles.

Not exactly a happy thought.  But we should be warned by the wisdom of the Proverbs.  

One last parting shot:  just because you're connected to people (via technology for instance) doesn't mean you're connected to them.  Isolation is a relational dynamic, not an accessibility issue.

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

Hanging on until Heaven?

One of the great lies perpetuated by Satan, I think, is that when Jesus saves us we just have to hang on until heaven.  It won't ever get better.  There's not much we can do.  No need to expect too much.  Just hang on until heaven.

It's certainly not the only lie, but it's a big one, in my pastoral opinion.

And it is a lie.

There is no need to hang on until heaven.  Jesus put His Spirit within us and promises to transform us.  He gives us His Word by which our minds are renewed and transformation comes.  He roots us in a church where people of various shapes, sizes, and stories rub against us in a way that helps us become something we're not.  And He give us a life-shaping purpose.

All of those strike at the heart of Satan's strategies and schemes.

Christ's Spirit within us gifts us and calls us to holiness, as He is holy.

Christ's Word reveals Reality - the way things really are - to us instead of the concocted and cockamamie faux world the Enemy wants us to believe.

Christ's Church reminds us that we're never alone and that isolation is demonic.

Christ's Purpose for us helps us impact the world with "love and good works" (Heb. 10.24-25).

In other words, we are called to be transformed by Jesus and then participate in His renovation project of the world.  That's us.  That's our role.  And that doesn't sound a bit like "hanging on until heaven."

But that's just me thinking thoughts...

What would you say in a mall in Kenya?

By all accounts, the terrorism unleashed on the mall in Nairobi was brutal and religiously motivated.  So much so that the terrorists allegedly asked if a person was a Muslim.  If the answer was affirmative, the hostage was released.  If the answer was no, most were shot dead.  In cold blood.  Brutal.

Some of my dear readers will need a caveat here about how Christianity hasn't had a clean reputation throughout history.  Say "Crusades" and you know the reaction we're talking about.  So caveat here.  Done.

More important than a politically correct caveat is this burning question:  what would you have said?  If knowing a simple answer of "Yes" to the question on the other end of an AK-47 would save your life, what would you have said?  If confessing Christ (or not confessing Islam) cost you your life, would you still confess Him?

And the answer to that question lies in this one:  do you really believe that dying is gain?

Well?  Do you?