If you haven't interacted with Emmerson Eggerichs' book Love and Respect, quit reading right now, click on this link, and order it for yourself.
If you're still here, then I wanted to take a second to ponder this thought as to how wives love their husbands. I touched on this briefly in the sermon on Sunday (though it may not be posted yet because our webmaster is on a mission trip - if not, stay tuned).
Only once in the NT (Titus 2.4) to my knowledge is a wife instructed to love her husband - and that verb is phileo, which in Paul's usage has a little more "like" to it than emotion or self-sacrifice. I take that to mean that wives generally do love their husbands. But Christ's command to respect their husbands is a different deal (Eph. 5.33).
We have a theological context for understanding this command. You can probably guess it, being as it's related to marriage. Respecting is how we interact with Christ. Some have issues going there but let's remember that Jesus is the Lord and is always worth our respect.
But here's the one thing that Eggerichs' book helped me with as a husband and has helped me as a pastor with marriages in our church. Wives do love their husbands. But respecting them is the way that husbands sense that love, receive that love. Wives love husbands by respecting them.
Whatever that looks like in your home, it's a good conversation to have over a dinner date that the husband sets up and for which he arranges childcare (hint hint). Other specific help is available in that book. It really is terrific.
But that's just me thinking thoughts...